My last 6 days

I’ve just survived the toughest week of my life thus far.
6 days in the jungles.

The whole week started with us marching 8km to our site. When we got to our site, we had to start building our Bashas (tents) its about 2 m in width and about 1.5m in height. First you’ll peg the sheet into the ground on 4 corners and you’ll erect it in the middle, upwards with a pole that’s about 1m high. 2 men have to sleep in this tiny little thing.
While we were building it, it started to pour… so we had to hide in the half finished basha. Furthermore, my basha had very little waterproof lining on it, so the thing started to leak. The first day hasn’t ended and it already feels like hell.
Soon the rain stopped and we continued building the tent, we also had to dig a drainage for the rain.. Which never did after we completed the drainage. Felt like a complete waste of effort. We stayed in this tent for 2 nights. During the day we learnt combat commands to overrun enemy forces in jungle terrain.

There was one day when we had artillery drills.
This are the steps to follow when there is artillery fire, we have to immediately get onto the ground, cover our necks and protect our rifle with our body. And after artillery is lifted, we have to run for our lives.
So one afternoon, the commanders decided surprise us with training for artillery fire.
We were in our prone position, in our guard stance, during dusk. Suddenly fake bombs were exploding everywhere and my first instincts were to cover my neck. I screamed artillery for like 2mins and when it stopped I dashed forward downhill into the jungles. But apparently we were meant to go back into our site area and collect our field bags and our belonging and form up for further instructions. So I had to run all the way up the hill again, pick my bag up, and my buddy’s too. Because he reported sick, I had to carry his bag and run to the meeting point. That 50m run felt like the longest run in my life. The bags felt like they were 30kgs, and no one was around me to help me carry them.. Every step I took, I could feel the pain in my knees. I ran to the meeting point and felt breathless. And even at the meeting point, our commanders were scolding us, telling us how selfish some of us were. Just wanting to cover our own asses. They told us that some of our men were eliminated because no one helped them to carry their stuff and the artillery had blown them up into pieces. From a platoon of about 37men, we fell down to a strength of about 27..

And continuing from that drill, we had to march in the dark to our new site, because apparently enemy forces have found us. The march was painful, My back was sore from the drill and my knees were killing me, I had trouble kneeling down during the march and the pain carried on till the next day. That night we slept cowboy style, 1 piece of ground sheet on the ground and nothing else. I lied down that night and started in the sky, wondering again why am I going through all this. I prayed and asked God why is he putting me through this, I asked for a sign, a reason.

Next day, we were given 1 hr to dig our shellscrap. It’s a coffin looking like thing. Imagine this, the hole had to be my height, my width, and knee depth.
They told us that we could do it in 45mins, and 1 hour was generous. We were also given incentives; first 5 people who can finish it get to call home for 2mins. I thought I could do it, but every swing of the small tiny blade into the ground made me feel like I was making no progress. The area to dig was just so much.
First hour went past and we had to come out and meet at the admin point, again our platoon were moving too slow. As expected, we were punished. Push-ups in position, sit-ups in position, kneel and place rifle above head, jumping jacks in positions, and alternate leg trust in position. I felt like dying when I was doing the punishments. I wanted to just fall down on the ground and give up.
But I made it through their punishments. I survived that 20mins. Then it was back to digging again. This time I completed my hole.. I felt so proud of it. I even had steps! Perfect 90-degree steps, for me to support my elbows when I’m aiming out of that hole. Night fell and we had to go back into our holes to sleep, but orders came around that we had to group up in threes and one out of the three have to be awake at all times, because commanders will be coming around checking up on us and we had to challenge them with passwords.
Because it was so dark, and visibility was too low there was one incident where one guy was just lying in his hole and when the commanders came around, he said “password lah” and the commanders gave him a lecture. haha!
Another guy went, “HALT! Weapon above your head!.... Weapon on the ground!... CONTACTED!”
The funny thing is that, you would only say contacted when you confirm the intruder with the password. This guy didn’t even ask the password and he affirmed that the intruder was an enemy! Lol!

Next day we were given some welfare.. A shower! When they told us to get our showering stuff, I felt so happy! Best thing ever. See, the thing is, up till our 5day we haven’t showered.. I felt so disgusting. So when showers were given to us, I felt like I got the best present in the world. I thought we were going to some toilet and we’re going to get time to clean our faces, which were filled with camouflage since the first day. But instead we were hosed down with a fire hose and we had 3mins.. THREE mins to soap ourselves and wash our faces! Despite getting so little time we were so happy that we had 3mins to wash up. But because of our rejoice, we neglected our behaviour and some of us even left our rifle behind.. Then hell broke loose again, our In charge was in push-up position while we were getting scolded. He also had to count our strength (number of men) while pushing up. Then when we got back to our holes, we were told to change into our dirty uniform again. And our officer, took water and poured it all over the dry ground… making it muddy. He then told us that we had to crawl in it. Crawl on our bellies.. That crawl made me have so many bruises on my knee and elbow.
Right after our crawling session, we had to cover up our holes.. Took me 20mins to cover up my 2hr worth of work. It was painful. That night we slept cowboy again. Nothing else but one ground sheet and us. When I took off my uniform that night I realised that I’ve got heat rash all over my back. Pain…
Last day, everyone was so happy! We all were just looking forward to getting back to our bunks. Our bunks with beds!
But the program today was to crawl under live firing.. That thought just made me shiver. What happens if I stand up? or I’m not low enough? I’ll die. People have before. And it’s not a joking matter. But as I came up to the crawling area, I hugged the ground like never before, I was so low that I think I was going too slow. The crawl was painful, my knees felt like exploding! We had to crawl 100m in belly crawl position. Currently the side of my knees are still bruised. Bad. But when we completed the crawl, I felt like I’ve accomplished something great.
I’ve survived One whole week of jungle training. One week without contact with the outside world. One week under the control of our insane commanders. One week…

During our stay in the jungles, there was an informal chat with the commanders and us, they asked us about our training thus far, and how we were coping along. They remind us of the reason why we serve NS, why we need to do this. And that was to protect our families, our loved ones. It sounds so cliché!
Most of the people also had the opportunity to read letters written by their loved ones.
I obviously didn’t get a letter, because the letter was sent to my house in Singapore and I had to open it myself. I can’t write a letter to myself right? Haha…
But it was at that moment that I felt so sad. I miss home so much. Everyone else has words from loved ones during their worst week ever.
But I felt the love of God over me, I had his peace coming over me. I know his has his arms over me.